Still Standing.

I didn’t know what this health scare would do to me but here I am, uniquely bent; I don’t break and utterly hormonal.

Learning this temporary new normal.

The part of me that defined womanhood; the part where I believed in feminine energy and love was ripped away, in so many ways, on two separate days and I had no choice.
It doesn’t matter.

I am brave with my life and I am unafraid to fail.
Believing in that love was a fail.
I didn’t know what to expect and the real complications that have since appeared reiterate why it’s difficult to deal with mental, physical and financial issues, in solitude.

But, I’m good.
~
No. I’m not.
I’m not good, but I want to be...

Because that’s who I am and I put on a brave face when it hurts so bad that I can’t breathe and I can’t see anyone for millennia.

And I don’t want to see you for millennia.
Or the thereafter.

Because that too, was a lie.

I neither want nor desire any sort of pity or sacrifice, so don’t bother with the nuisance of it all. Keep my love. You need it more than I do.

I just need the physical strength I could always count on that disappeared when you did.
And.
Unlike most others; I do have time.